Baseball Dreamer Pillows

'You're behind on every pitch, Billy! Try choking up on the bat!'

"Would you explain to your son that there's no free agency in T-ball?"

'No, Billy, their first baseman is messing with your head. You won't go to hell for stealing second.'

'Good luck, kid. I trained at age 3, was traded twice by age 5 and I peaked at 7.'

'This is what happens, Billy, when you don't listen to your Little League coach.'

'I was up twice and got one hit, which gives me an lifetime average of 500!'

'OK, that's strike two. What is your third wish?'

"If I'm not in the Hall of Fame by 41 I'm getting induced."

"... Now playing center field for the Yankees... Peter the Great!..."

Inventing the baseball.

"Okay, if it hits the wall it's a triple, and if it goes through Mr. Baker's window, that's a home run."

"I'm sorry, Timmy, but Mr. Jeter's promise to hit you a home run isn't covered by your existing HMO."

'AS a kid I dreamed of playing first base, but all my parents could afford was an oven mitt.'

Field of Broken Dreams

A bunch of baseball players sitting on a baseball diamond watching TV.

"I'm sorry but Mr. Berrell is in Port St. Lucie trying out for the Mets."

"I was sent down to the minors and from there to Europe, and one thing just led to another."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

"I'm less a role model than a cautionary tale."

"Whaddya want for nineteen mil?"

Enjoying a picnic at the rugby ground

Fuzz - Fuzzy writes a song with a positive message.

Guitarist: 'We can freely improvise some other time ... now let's practise.' (With Derek it was always jam tomorrow)

'I'm sure I could lie on my back waving my feet in the air if I could play the saxophone.'

Midnight Basketball

"I'm running away to join the W.N.B.A."

'He followed me home, Mom. Can I sign him to a five-year, $80-million contract?..'

Baseball Dreams

'This game is going to be a character-building experience.'

'He's got a good attitude, and he's tall. But he's got to get into the weight room.'

Not The Real Me

"Behind the back, between the legs, around my disappointed parents, nothing but net."

Ahhh, spring baseball.