Barnyard Philosophers T-Shirts

"My job is not as easy as it looks: You have to learn about astronomy and celestial mechanics to be able to accurately predict sunrise and sunset..."

'You need an education or you will wind up in some fast food place.'

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

"They’re real."

"Next time you score show a little respect and don't spike uncle Frank so hard."

Cock A Doodle

Alas poor Daisy, I knew her well!

'Take my advice kid. Enjoy yourself now, because once you get married, your free ranging days are over.'

'To be honest I'm sick of truffles.'

Moo! OOM!

Drawing on the left side of the barn.

'I'm sorry young lady, but you're not old enough to be free range!'

'Remember, chew every bite 32 times.'

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

Wife to husband dressed as pantomime cow: 'I know you're exhausted, love, but at least the panto season is now ... BEHIND YOU!!'

Ham-Dram

Bad news I'm afraid. Our universe is shrinking!

'Your barn door's open.'

"....one minute I'm there - chewing the cud - the next, I get this urge to lead!"

'The cow mooed, the pig oinked, the chicken clucked, I baaed and then we adjourned.'

'With a herd of three cows it doesn't take long for inventory, does it, Dad?'

'Oi! We're your nipples you idiot!'

"I didn't mean to trample him. How do you say 'my bad' in human?"

'What's that smell?'

"I'm tired of having to apologize for the condition of the house."

'I've been experiencing a lot of deja moo.'

"We need less cowbell!"

"Can you milk a cow?"

"Dad...how do you know when to stop?"

'These lousy free-range chickens think that they just own the whole world!'

'First of all, I want you to know that my door is always open...'

"I was going to go to the other slop trough, but the music's always too loud."

'I forgot to tell you Neddy's not 'broken-in' yet...!'

'Is it slop yet?'

'No. I insist. You first.'