Bargain Vacationer T-Shirts

'We don't have the money for everyone to go, and, well, our luggage has never been to the Bahamas before...'

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

'Oh, rustic used to mean 'no indoor plumbing', but now it means, 'No computers'!'

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

'He must be going economy!'

An airplane with a sardine can opener instead of a door

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

'And, at those prices, we have two wheel well seats available.'

Cheapskate Cruises

'Can I ask you what you've had to eat this morning, Sir? . . .Have you evacuated your bowels since then? . . . I'm afraid I'll have to charge you for the additional weight.'

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

'Phone for help? Are you mad? Have you any idea how much it costs to use a mobile abroad?'

'Any other husband would hire two pairs of skis.'

"Welcome to the French Quarter!"

"This is the last time I let you handle our vacation plans, you cheapskate."

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

Expensive greeting cards.

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

"Rome was great – aside from the roaming fees."

Overdoing it.

Ticket machine costing an arm and a leg.

Scene on the English coast.

"I know what the airlines charge to check a bag is outrageous, but. . ."

Europe on $5000 a day.

Excess Baggage: Many hotels, inspired by the airlines are gouging their guests by adding 'resort fees' to the room rates.

"For an extra charge, your flight can come with angst and insecurity."

"Oh, boy. Comfort food."

Andy's first airplane experience was marred by his grandmother's stinginess