Barfly Banter Prints

'She didn't say yes and she didn't say no -- she said 'get out of here before I call a cop.''

"Lost a step? Hell, no. Those young zebras are juiced."

"Play coy if you like, but no one can resist a perfectly symmetrical face."

"My wife understands me."

Your place or mine, or right here?

'Yeah she's got a good figure, but her dress sense puts me off.'

"Hang on mate - are you off-duty..??"

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

"I think I speak for my entire generation when I say, 'Yes, I will have another drink.' "

"An everything Martini, please."

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

'You shouldn't knock them back so quickly.'

Pretty girls listen patiently. They know you'll soon get tongue-tied and won't be able to talk anymore.

"Stranger, you're sitting in the boss's personal spot. That's why they moved the dart board over your head."

"... And to this day, she still blames the dog!"

'Crushing empty beer cans is for wimps.'

Andy Oxidant meets Free Radical.

Adam and Eve toast next to a serpent bartender.

"I forget to drink."

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

"You seem dangerous. I like that."

'No Fred, this one is one me!'

"This cheap can of domestic beer has a bouquet reminiscent of...beer."

"I don't suppose you get many sovereign rulers in here anymore?"

'Joe has been partying hard!'

'I'm 3 years old - that's 21 dog years - so start pouring!'

"I got tired of wearing a hat."

"If it's my pride, I'm not here"

"Catnip for everyone."

'Fried chickens.'

Those Senior Moments: 'Tell me something - do I come here often?'

'Your switching to Scotch? And after I've given you the best beers of my life!'

Quiz Night...

"Gimme a lite. Bug Lite."

'Telephone call for Mr. Right!'