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'Sorry to bother you - neighbours reported a 'roving band of anarchists.''

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

Please Drove Carefully.

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

Save Our Universe

Never tell the boss "You can count on me" during inventory.

He's making a list --- Holmes solves cases quicker when he itemizes deductions.

'You're reordering your priorities? -- Since when do you have priorities?'

'Very good and to the point.'

"Your top 10 list of reasons why you didn't do your homework is creative, but not acceptable."

"Boss, the customers can hear you cackling maniacally." "I've topped myself, minion." "It's not enough to run ads that tout our own excellence: we have to simultaneously tear down the competition." "Behold: my masterpiece." "'100 percent of those who drink Coffee King’s coffee will die.'" "Best part is it’s technically true."

'I can't believe I'm pretending to be 55 already...'

Painter removes 'wet paint' sign from park bench and replaces it with a 'dry paint' sign.

'I've got it written down...'

Man looking at sign that reads 'Hord Wark' and says: "I can't put that up. It's too much like hard work."

"I didn't get anything I asked for last year so I want your acceptance of this year's list to be notarized."

'Maybe putting 'Sleep 20 Hours A Day' first on the list wasn't such a good idea.'

"It does clearly say 'tow-away zone'."

"Oh, no! My bucket list!"

"That would've gone better if I'd gotten here with my gift list instead of my spelling list."

Two men who work for The Federal Department of Bureaucracy look at chart 'Things to Pretend to do Today'

"Johnny is absent minded, lazy, easily distracted, loaf of bread, milk, half a pound of cheese...."

Middle age anxiety about leaving the house.

Caution wet floors. . . Caution DRY ceilings.

I try to stick to hunting. My wife makes me take a list when I'm gathering.

"Thanks, I'll write that down."

As soon as we invent writing, we should put up a "Danger! Tar Pit!" sign here.

'I started making a list of things to do this morning, and before I knew it, it was quitting time.'

"Hey, the last thing I want to do is annoy you. That's actually ninth on my to-do list."

'I'm afraid we must move with the times, Mr Bagley.'

"There's nothing much happening tonight... so I'm going to just talk about myself!"

"I'd like to make a list. What do we kick when we die?"

'On the internet, nobody knows you're a monkey.'

"Do you have to write down all the things you need to worry about?"

"I feel a term in congress generating headlines is a good practice for a future as a highly paid media provocateur."