Banking Skeptics Prints

Your Money Back if and when We Feel Like It.

It's either a phantom withdrawal or a new bank service charge.

Standard & Poor

"You want to withdraw your money? There's a fee for that."

'Okay, let the minutes show we're not absconding with the money until the economy improves...'

'I've been in Washington for 30 years, and that's the biggest rathole I'VE ever seen!'

It's the same ingredients and aftertaste as stimulus 1..."

Deposits insured by the U.S. Government (which has a $4.2 trillion debt).

The private sector is a parasite on the economy.

We lost money in every division, but through the magic of accounting, our Take A Penny Leave A Penny trays earned $46 million.

Bank Robbery Statistics

'Great speech on the future of the economy. You said nothing with great conviction.'

'You're a bad credit risk so, yes, of course you can have some money.'

"Have you ever wanted something so bad that you'd actually save up the money to buy it?"

Deposits Insured By The U.S. Government (which has a $29 Trillion Debt).

EuroPygmees

'We're worried about your ability to lend us money.'

see no evil...hear no evil...SEC can't even spell evil

"I'd heard banks were reluctant to give businesses money - but I didn't think it was this bad..."

"I just want enough to get out of the country, and disappear forever."

"How do we know this isn't a ponzi scheme?"

'Maybe so, sir, but our motto is, 'A penny saved is a lot of trouble for nothing.''

'I can remember when banks competed for customers...Now its shareholders.'

"Wait, sir. It's a new banking regulation -- You can't leave without depositing something."

"I take it you've never had a bank account before?"

'Actually, trickle-down economics is over with ? what you hear now is the sound of special interests drooling.'

Trouble at the U.S. Federal Reserve.

'Usury' is not a pretty word, Mr. Williams.

Victims of Financial Consultant's

"There's a new weapon that destroys people but it leaves buildings standing. It's called corporate banking."

Home-Town Savings: A super-conglomerated financial company with a local-sounding name designed to put you at ease while we play with your money like a drunk tourist in Vegs.

'They're the only people getting any money from banks these days.'

'First it's global warming, now they say we've got negative equity.'

"So in conclusion, you're 'on target'...maybe, perhaps...but I wouldn't want you to hold me to that!"

STRIP Hambone: Random Number Generator