Balding Bazooka Gifts

Man having thinning hair blasted by cafe speaker.

"Be creative...!"

'The hair specialist is down the hall.'

"How many verses of 'Froggie Went A-Courting' are there, Jay, before your pill kicks in?"

Male Pattern Baldness

"Sun block and bug spray and rogain, oh my! ..."

"When it takes longer to wash your face, you're getting bald."

A la recherche des cheveux perdus.

'I know it doesn't look like much, but have you ever been shot in the face with a p****d off cat?'

Lion Toupee

Flying carpet

'I use that to check for combovers.'

Whale Pattern Balding

Male Mid-Life Myth--The Hair Fairy

"I'm hoping that someday I might be reunited with my biological hair."

Hair loss comb.

Whale Pattern Balding,

"Face it, Herb, you're a bald eagle..."

Budget Toupees.

"All I know is there are no do-overs, but there are comb-overs."

'Here's one I wrote to cover the sound of my wife's voice telling me nobody is going to pay to hear my songs.'

'Don't be silly- it doesn't bother me that you're going prematurely piebald,'

'Oh my God!! My hair's falling out!!'

"You can't join the Federal Witness Protection Program just to eep your friends from seeing your bald spot."

'Are those plugs, Carl?'

"He wants some hair restorer for his birthday."

"Your hair count is dangerously low."

Man's Hair Flies Off When Doctor Tests His Reaction

"Ambitions... To have a bad hair day."

"Ok - what makes you so sure that it's a wig??"

'No, we're not religious. Sam just wears that cap to hide his bald spot.'