Backyard Chiller Pillows

'Everyone called and canceled for tonight's dinner party? Awesome!'

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

On holiday.

'Have a nice weekend, Alfred.'

"Nice family you’ve got there. Too bad if anything were to happen to them."

"This chicken wasn't cooked - it committed suttee!"

'Your wife wants to know if she should get a new propane tank for the barbecue.'

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

A man gets a paper cut while reading in his back yard and is attacked by 'Lawn Sharks'.

"My secret is having a ton of money to buy the best ingredients."

'Oh, for god's sake just ignore it!'

Leaf-Blowers: Loudly making yardwork someone else's problem since the 1960s.

'Ironically, sportswear is the most comfortable clothing for doing nothing in.'

The Clueless Diver

"He thinks he learned a new trick - I don't have the heart to tell him it's just an old trick he forgot he knew."

'Lookout, here comes another boatload of cartoonists.'

"Memo from the top, guys. Apparently the 'casual dress days' are getting a little out of hand"

Mall Santa's Anonymous: 'Holidays are always the hardest - especially Christmas.'

'It doesn't say anything....They're having a barbecue!'

"I'm calling it Cajun Blackened Chicken!"

"Five million channels! This is heaven indeed!"

"It's a victory garden. And the weeds have won."

Living next door to area 51

"What … have … you … done?"

Beware of Watchdog

"Alice! The kebabs are ready!"

'My guess is, you might be running the jets too high...'

"Why is that moron screaming so loud at something that isn't there?"

"He likes his bones smoked."

"We're still pre-rich."

"Well, a ringer and a laner - looks like you win honey..."

"Of course I'm a nervous wreck. I'm man's best friend! Who can take that kind of pressure?"

Fire and Fury was my ex-husband when he couldn't get the barbeque started!

"Don't worry. . . they will find us. . . we're still in the backyard. . . I just didn't cut the grass. . ."

Dang, they fell through again – Maybe I should mash the worms into a patty. Peck the Cook.