Backwards Counter Aficionado T-Shirts

Sent to perform routine maintenance on Vancouver's Olympic Clock, Lyle would not be asked again.

"Desmond likes to live in the moment. . . and that moment happens to be 1960."

'1,2,3 4,5,6 7,8,9...'It's the little things that count.(little figurines counting).

"Well, at least we know she died peacefully."

"If we can't find the way forward, let's find the way back."

"I prefer 'prostitute'. 'Media whore' implies that I'm not getting paid."

"Der, dad. . . it's wireless!"

"Ever since the elevator broke down, we've learned that our staff is in desperate need of a fitness program. Especially, since we're only one floor up."

These upside-down tomato planters simplify everything. But, dad. Mother nature wants plants to grow upwards. Sez who?

'You disgust me; but I like it.'

The 39 Steps

I add 1,000 steps every day just going back to my car to get the mask I was supposed to put on."

'Reinventing myself.'

'I've bought myself a pedometer: I want to see how much ground we cover during the annual migration...'

'Museum of Hippy Culture' 'No smoking the Exhibits'

'My new fitness tracker counted 15,000...Unfortunately 14,900 of them were to the fridge and back!'

"Really should so some exercise. . . ."

"Honestly, Kate—can you picture us in a shopping mall?"

"It's 10000 steps a DAY, not a YEAR!"

Not Such A Fool As He Looks.

'You're not really into this, are you Mahoney?'

"You've been eating that 'special' grass again, haven't you?"

"Of course there was sex and drugs when I was your age, but it was sex and drugs about ending the war."

'My homework? Why, at home.'

"Forget 10,000 steps. I've programmed it to help me reach 10,000 dollars a day."

'Who's idea was it to run backwards to Christmas for charity?'

"He killed in rehab."

'We scaled way, way back. In fact, this might be a good opportunity to get in on the ground level - again.'

The New Ager

Tree's Tree Nursery. Don't forget to tell customers about our upside-down tomatoes. What? People love the suspended buckets. It's then latest thing. That's torture, dad! Would you have grown me hanging from the ceiling if it were the "latest thing"? Ok. Don't answer that.

"It's a setback, but we'll bounce back."

It's worse than you think - his tail's actually chasing him.

"1 cookie, 2 donuts, 3 cupcakes, 4..."

"Kid, you got a 'While You Were Out' message."

'Your eyes are limpid pools. What are you on?'