Awkward Networker Prints

After two years on zooms, Arthur was having trouble coping with face to face networking again. . .

Good Luck!

WiFi Signals

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

What price beauty?

"How sweet, your hand is trembling."

"And I never kiss in the first two seconds."

Writer Services: We fix plot holes.

'Next time you feel like keeping in touch, keep in touch with somebody else.'

'Would you like to come in for a rejection?'

'You can social network me behind my ears if you like.'

"Pardon us, Harrison, if the board fails to share your enthusiasm for the foliage up in Darien,"

People I've Met At Parties Whose Names I've Forgotten

"Don't worry, I'm a doctor."

"Marlowe filled the crooked gumshoe full of lead. He watched the smoke from his .38 coil in the air as he… mommy’s behind me, isn’t she?"

"Remember - kindergarten is an excellent opportunity to make connections for first grade."

Internet Name Tags.

"At Ermbruster Academy you son will acquire indispensible life skills."

"Tell your date you're a vegetarian before he orders that expensive gourmet dinner."

"You'll soon get the hang of the simple Linex 3968X with 4936.." Norman began to think he might be better suited to a career in double glazing."

"Actually, I don't know anybody here. I was just passing the house when I heard all the fun."

"Gentlemen, let's do lunch."

"Insider trading is so last century, I prefer exclusive networking opportunities."

'You two will have lots in common - you share the same anxiety neurosis.'

And remember, you're supposed to be promoting me!

Nethead strip: Dates

"Get names!"

Men Networking

"You're just toying with me, aren't you?"

Small Talk Lounge

Dr Atkins on a date: 'Why does he keep looking at me like I'm a piece of meat?'

Golf course deals - 'Rule of thumb: Anyone who has spent five hundred dollars for a putter, and two hundred for a lime green golf shirt, that's someone you want to get to know.'

Absent Friends Reunited.

"Does this mean I have to talk to someone I don't know?"

Send. End.