Awkward Moment Enthusiast Pillows

"I've never said this to anyone before, David, but you've got some pigeon droppings or something in your hair."

"Quick! Remind me - are they handshakers, huggers, single kissers, or kissers on both cheeks?"

"Ask me again once your skin clears up." Never propose in broad daylight.

"Well, right now I'm feeling a little uncomfortable."

Jack's first meeting with Melanie's parents, suddenly turned awkward.

'No offence, Captain, but two's company, three's a crowd!'

"Are you properly qualified to give advice on this Dad?"

"I think that one is a little too honest."

'He came in for a job interview three hours ago, and I made the mistake of telling him to make himself comfortable.'

'Actually, Dad knows quite a bit about sex for a man his age.'

"Wow...you got a hickey?"

'Maybe sharing a list of our past partners wasn't such a good idea, after all.'

'Wow...so you became a...wow...er...and how is the pimping trade nowadays?'

'I hope we're not too early.'

'It's strange that you should ask for my daughter's hand. Only this morning she told me she wants to give you the elbow.'

'Some things are better left unsaid but I never know what they are until after I've said them.'

"You have to get up early tomorrow, too? We have so much in common!"

"We are having a leaving collection for Thompson in accounts....oops!"

"It's hard looking cool when your foot is stuck in a tree."

"So nice to finally meet you, I must have watched that film Glen posted of you giving birth at least a hundred times."

'My opinion?...You have lovely boobs.'

"This is why I hate bringing you shopping."

'I think my father really likes you...he said you have big boobs!'

When it came to picking up women, Dalton was an utter failure.

'Mom, your flask is throbbing!'

"I just need to take a photo."

"I think I should tell you, I once went viral."

". . . and so the wife says to me. . . Earl she said, you really have to stop talking to strangers."

"If you are looking for your clothes, you left them at last night's office party."

'Dear Jon...'

Awkward Moments

"Nice going, idiot! You just blew the first impression."

"I can't believe Tia Carmen is working in our cafeteria! This bites! How can she do this to me?"

'Did you notice your dad flirting with me all evening?'

'No, my 'daughter' doesn't need a high chair, but my wife could use some silverware.'