Awkward Moment Capturer Pillows

'Oh, do you do Sumo?'

Showbiz Awards

'Let's see here... Mr. Stevens... it says you slipped in the tub and hit your head.'

"Something romantic, perhaps?"

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

'When you asked me over for a home-cooked meal, I assumed you'd be making it.'

Lady to man taking picture of fish: 'Wiggle him a little and get him to smile.'

"I was a lot happier with the elephant in the room."

Always an awkward moment when you meet a Dung Beetle...

When we met, you told me you make a lousy first impression. Well, guess what: You also make a lousy second impression. Actually, my only decent impression is Kirk Douglas. Wanna hear it?

You're so beautiful, I can't take my eyes off you, even though there's a fly in my soup doing the backstroke, which is comedy gold!

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

"You and your daft inventions."

A boy with a camera

Would madam like me to send over the sympathy steward?

'Eh...our costume party was last Saturday!'

"Humiliation is a very important part of the the process, Mr. Keifer."

"OK, I know that this is borderline inappropriate, but just hear me out ..."

'Show one more kitten photo,lady and the next time you see me will be on a 'missing' poster!'

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."

"Such a cute doggie! And I'll bet you make the cutest poopies too, don't you?"

Waiter does not want to see customer make bubbles in his wine.

"Ignore the screams, sir. I'll get a new fork."

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

"Good evening, I'm your date. Let me begin by saying I'm sorry I'm late, I'm sorry I'm bald and I'm sorry I'm short."

'Look. . . for the last time, I'm not playin' 'footsie' with you!'

"Are you blushing?!"

"Don't make eye-contact, don't make eye-contact..."

"I'm sensing an awkward presence."

"If that girl sent over a double cappuccino, maybe you should go talk to her!"

Speed Dating Disasters

'By the way Adrian, it unfastens at the front.'

Baldo's How to Be Uncool: No. 5. Forget how hot the coffee is while you're thinking how cool you look sitting in a coffee shop.

"On a scale of 1-10, how painfully awkward is this?"

As years of unspoken tension surfaced, Trunky refused to raise his hand like a coward.