Award Season Analyst Prints

"We need to make it through at least one movie, so we have something to root for during the Oscars."

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Showbiz Awards

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

Buisnessman Of The Hour - I'd like to introduce our guest but he is 45 minutes late

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

"To save time, I'll just mention the people I’m not thanking."

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

'For the actress who benefitted most by rehab...'

'And the Award goes to...Ewww...him?'

"It's touching, actually, to see white dudes fumble around for a few last moments in the spotlight."

'I'm terribly worried, Doctor - he doesn't talk back to Bill O'Reilly any more.'

May I have the envelope, please?

"And the award for Best Product Placement in a Domestic or Foreign Film goes to..."

Barbie Oscars

Oscars acceptance speech.

"I'd like to thank my mum..."

"The idiots don't realise that flying in a private jet is meant to be IRONIC!"

Oscars

'And the winner of the 'biggest loser in love' category is...'

Djargo.

"First, I'd like to thank everyone who believed in me."

"This should be interesting. . . they're giving an acting award for best political lie. . ."

"I want to thank all the little people."

"I think I just won Best Director!"

"Sadie, you were around in the sixties...was 'Mad Men' accurate?"

"Nominations for best skinny mad white dude goes to..."

Man reads from card at awards ceremony: 'And the award for Best Actress goes to ...'

Will Smith's Oscar