Avian Pun Appreciator Pillows

Early Bird.

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

"It does have a side effect. You'll faint when I tell you how much it will cost to produce."

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

"Trust me, Lew, if anyone knows where the salmon are jumping, she does!"

"Another dry scotch Manhattan, Mike. Make it a double."

Seagiraffes

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

"He's taken buzzed to a whole new level."

First Novels.

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

"I said I wanted to visit the Brandenburg Gate."

"I only travelled with my umbilical cord!"

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

'Your French dip, sir.'

"I don't want to fork. I just want to spoon."

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

QUINTUPLE BYPASSES EXPLAINED.

To no ones surprise, they ran head-on into one another. (All couples are wearing teachers reading 'I'm with Stupid'.)

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

"Samson was the best actor in the bible - he brought the house down!"

Stoneage puncture repair kit...

hard-boiled egg...