Avian Healthcare Enthusiast T-Shirts

"We must be in the wrong wing."

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

'I checked the database, Mrs. Nimitz. There's no such symptom.'

"Do me next."

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

"When I grow up, I want to go into medicine and help people who can pay out of pocket."

So you're a mocking bird...

'Darling - I think it's time to stop feeding the birds.'

'…and remember - around HERE, ‘talk is CHEEP'.'

I no longer migrate. It's easier to just telecommute.

'What's wrong with me, Doctor?' 'I have no idea! That information comes within doctor-patient confidentiality.'

Why would birdie need newspaper?

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

"We don't observe 'casual Fridays' here."

"Yes, go and play, but be careful, there are a few thermals around: make sure you're not lifted too high..."

'I asked if you were affiliated with an HMO not a UFO.'

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

"I don't actually talk, I just mimic sounds."

"Homosapius amorius... the common lovebirds."

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

Coronavirus Global Alert

"You only need one prescription. The other 7 are for the side effects."

"....H....5....N...1...???You got me.... but I'm sure it spells trouble."

Bird about to dive from diving board into birdbath

Steven had a sneaky suspicion that the local birds were beginning to rely upon here.

"As soon as your dentist gets here, we'll begin."

Birds on a wire, "Bernie?...Oh he's gone cable!"

"So you're interested in medicine, public relations, business, contract negotiations and insurance law? Which one will you study in school?"

"Stop squawking. Use your words."

Get well soon!

Man lets his pigeons out to be fed in the park.

"Those are the lyrics? How embarrassing—I've been singing it wrong this whole time."

"Oh...Hi Bob, listen buddy, I'm in a meeting right now, I'll Caw you back."

Flamingo on a bird table feeding from a shrimp container.