Automotive Technology T-Shirts

'Six gallons of ethanol, three of it corn, two of it sugar cane and the rest cellulosic biomass.'

"The great thing about selling these babies is that if the buyer misses a payment the car drives itself back to our dealership!"

"It's got an incredible range for an E.V."

Peak Oil and its effect on car design.

'NEW! Runs on alcohol' 'What a coincidence - so does he.'

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

'My electric car is giving me static!'

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"Somehow, they get exempted from a lot of laws."

Bob's Driving School.

'According to the diagnostic computer, your problems are due to El Nino.'

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

'I think I've isolated that funny noise you've been having.'

"We located the hissing noise, Mr. Watkins. Your wife's mother is in the back seat."

'Rats, I don't think we'll ever get this thing going: It's flooded again...'

"This car is very fast and very expensive. Just how bad is your midlife crisis?"

'You don't have the muscles to buy a muscle car, dear.'

'You got clowns in your engine. That's what's making them funny noises.'

"Can I talk to someone who knows something?"

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

"Perfect."

Computer Controlled Car

"We're having a little trouble with our hydraulic lift. I guess my question is, do you still want your muffler replaced?"

"This baby gets such horrible miles per gallon, you actually save on gas because nobody can afford to drive it!"

Bartlett's Unfamiliar Quotations

"Baldo, I don't care what you are...as long as you're good at it."

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."

'Would you do that noise that your car makes on more time...it's hilarious!'

"Nap time."

"Is that one of those cars that tells you when it needs maintenance?"

'Have you tried hitting Ctrl-Alt-Delete?'