Automotive Absurdist Pillows

'It gets me from A to B alright but it won't get me from B back to A!!'

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

CLEAR!

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

'If you want to hear the ocean, press one.'

World's cheapest car

'Could you ask him where he left the remote?'

"Don't you ever run off again to get your oil changed without telling me."

Crashed Aliens - "Miss Fortnum, come in here immediately..and bring the first aid kit."

'It's a British car. Needs braces.'

Executioner forgetting his glasses.

"I can't wait to post this."

"If you are a Pulitzer-prize winner, press 1. All others, please press 2."

'We try to only make bad loans to good people.'

"I'm afraid the only thing we have in your line of work at the moment is a bingo caller in Milton Keynes."

"I'm so glad you suggested we insert his heart on Valentine's Day!"

All you'd expect in a British car!

G.K. Chesterton.

"It's good luck."

"GPS wants me to stay put."

The very rare and elusive Eskimo turtle.

Paul Verlaine

"It's a hybrid if you think it is. Runs on gas and the power of positive thinking."

Driving a Lemon.

"I'm waiting for a bed."

"..and I've recently had it converted to LGP"

God has an attack of vertigo

"I got a 'millennial anti-theft device' in my car." "Steering wheel lock?" "Stick shift."

"Clean your wallet, sir?"

"So tell me about your early years on the road..."

Road rage in the car-to-car technology era.

Tin man visits automotive oil change facility.