Automobile Engineer T-Shirts

Air bags.

Where airbags should be.

Now // Near Future

'Six gallons of ethanol, three of it corn, two of it sugar cane and the rest cellulosic biomass.'

'This is more than the estimate.'

Formula one winner runs through finish line,

"Seat belts unfastened? Excellent."

'How many miles to the gallon?'

'Crash test dummy parking only' sign.

'The battery is in excellent shape. What IT needs is a new car!'

Physics toy.

"Check the catalytic converter while you're in there, please."

'It's official - seventy miles per gallon.'

"Next time you buy a car... can you ask if it is self assembly?"

My brand-new electric car allows me to travel freely to almost all four corners of the living room.

'We can't be sure, but we think your car is faking it.'

Barry's newly-invented 'prescription windscreen' tended to alarm most of the other road users.

Yes officer, I was talking on my cell phone when I crashed - I called 911 to say that my brakes were out.

Safety innovations include a rageometer warning light that measures pulse and blood pressure.

'I'd bet that with that race engine, you could beat anybody to the neighborhood grocery store.'

A production line adds condiments to cars

"Watch how you act in this car. It's so high tech, it posts stuff on social media."

'It states here you filed an accident claim everyday at your other job.'

The Auto Recall Track.

"I brought you a new car last year."

Oil Cuts.

'Sir, you would not believe the airbag.'

"Thank goodness for rear-engine cars!"

Test dummies in car, "Oh my god dave, look out for that wall!"

'If you're wondering why you're still in first gear, that was me you just shifted into third.'

Seat belts - The giving of life.

If Bernie Ecclestone does not get his pound of flesh from Montreal, the Canadian Grand Prix will not roll.

'Do you remember what make of car it was, sir? -- We'll have to order parts.'

"She's family."

"Tell Mrs. Pomeroy we've found the source of that strange hint of musk."