Auto Safety Buff Pillows

Two cars trvelling in opposite directions have crashed into telephone poles. One was texting while driving the other was reporting him via text . .

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

"They retired me. Just like that. Seems I'm no good over 55 mph anymore." "How does that make you feel?" "Like I want to bash my head against a wall!"

"We'll get there when we get there!"

"Remember, when you back up, make that 'beep beep' sound."

"Seriously Dad, it totally wasn't my fault."

Knights Wing Mirrors.

'What the … ? How did those thugs get into my car?'

Echo Mountain...NO Yodeling! - Falling rock zone.

"I've seen this before. Keep his head inside the car when the vehicle is in motion."

"Warning! Not to be used as a life saving device."

Halloween health & safety.

"It helps prevent side collisions."

'Things are going from bad to worse in the auto industry.'

'I say we forget about these particular chickens...'

"It's the worst case of Sick Building Syndrome I've ever seen!"

How you can tell that the environmentalists won the elections...

'When it comes to our Boef flambe safety is paramount.'

'See? If Mommy had been wearing her seatbelt that wouldn't have happened.'

The Cone Ranger

'Do not be alarmed... this is only a drill!'

'Cover me whilst I cross the road...'

"Duck? No I ordered the beef."

Test dummies in car, "Oh my god dave, look out for that wall!"

"What do I do when I get to the top?"

Piano Airbag

'Wow, thanks for finding my skateboard, daddy!'

The best safety device is a rearview mirror with a cop car in it.

Crash Test Dummy Denied Insurance.

'Stop complaining. We can't afford a car with airbags.'