Auto Nostalgist Pillows

Car Show. Hey, look at those! My first car was a Corvair, you know! My first car was a Beetle! There was something special about driving those old rear-engine models! I miss it. These days most cars with engines are in the back are so expensive! I wish I could afford one. Ferrari. I should have guessed they'd like rear-engine cars ... Guys like that are used to being pushed around.

Vehicles are having their own election. These are the candidates. The ambulance appeals to voters who think health care is most important. Voters focusing on education issues favor the school bus. And those wanting family-friendly policies are backing the minivan. The tractor is an expert on agricultural issues, and the import is a free trade advocate. Those voters concerned about environmental issues like the electric hybrid, and those wanting a strong military support the Jeep. What's t

What's wrong with the computer you've got?"

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

"I'd like a new tire for my 1976 Chevy Chevette."

"Oh great, the printer is down."

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

Once upon a time and a half. Buick and the Beast.

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

"Can I talk to someone who knows something?"

Telephone line ends up buried in the ground with a headstone.

Car wash / Mouth wash

"Go ahead and laugh, but this baby hasn't crashed since 1961."

Social Media

and this little light starts blinking when your computer becomes obsolete

'Like the 'Cobra' and the 'Viper', my car is named for a snake too - the 'Rattler'.'

"Cancel my landline...are you crazy?"

Nice park. . .

"He's teaching me map skills, such as how to fold it."

"I've had a tip off that someone on the team has been using email."

'...please switch of all mobile phones, paging devices and alarm watches...'

"You have $3,098 in the bank? I'm impressed! So...do you think about investing it?"

Chicken Coupe.

'Nice smile.'

"Apparently it's my fault, somehow, that we have an S.U.V."

The average taxpayer will ultimately embrace the auto industry bailout. Hell, we sold em all that useless undercoating for all these years!

"Television sets evolved from animals. My randpop remembers when they had rabbit ears!"

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

Abandoned Vehicles Along The Information Superhighway.

A man drives a car with the word "LAWYER" painted backwards on the front hood so that it can be read in the rear-view mirrors of other cars.

'Every time I pass through here I get heartburn.'

'No fax paper? Ok, you'll have to ride for help.'

'And of course if you'e feeling patriotic today, we have here a new line of PCs produced by the federal government.'

"Yep, she's gonna cost ya—your microprocessor's shot."