Auto Lover Gifts

'I said they're good, but expensive.'

Man with big furry mustache drives car with grill that looks like same.

"In layman's terms, it's £12,750."

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

"Why do they do that?"

CLOTHES-HORSES OF THE ART SCENE

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

"I need to tinkle."

Vehicles are having their own election. These are the candidates. The ambulance appeals to voters who think health care is most important. Voters focusing on education issues favor the school bus. And those wanting family-friendly policies are backing the minivan. The tractor is an expert on agricultural issues, and the import is a free trade advocate. Those voters concerned about environmental issues like the electric hybrid, and those wanting a strong military support the Jeep. What's t

Clown throws a bucket of confetti over car at 'Jimbo's carwash'.

"I didn't complain, when you crashed the computer."

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

'Are we nearly there yet?'

Dog Park

Micro Psychiatry Clinic. You have a full schedule today, Doctor. The helium atom will be here to work on his fear of heights. The white blood cell with a germ phobia and amoeba with separation anxiety are coming in. The DNA molecule will be here about an identity crisis. And here, in the sports car, comes a new patient, a carbon-14 isotope. Ah, looks like he's going through a half-life crisis!

Sailor in Car.

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

Under pressure.

"Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?"

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

Man has a picture of a rolls on his garage door...the car inside is very different.

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

Driverless cars rage.

Another Turning Point in the Industrial Revolution. Ford Motor Co. On second thought, let's put the cars on the conveyor belt.

Coexist. Coexhaust.

Deflator mouse

'Enough already. It's a car, not a transporter.'

Useless add-ons.

Motor Tourism

A man in a car waits for a large herd of cows to cross the road; once they have crossed he finds a cow sitting in the passenger seat of his car.

"As you can hear, it has an engine that purrs ... '

"G.P.S. FOR GUYS"

'You don't have a license and registration, do you?'

The Slug Replaces the Cheetah as the Fastest Animal on Earth.