Audio Producer Prints

Books - Now on audio tape! 'Learn the sign language in 10 days'.

This call may be recorded and used in a podcast.

Bookstore. I thought you wanted a book on tape. This is a book on tape. It's about the 3M Company.

"I'm not mocking your song—I'm sampling it."

"What happened?! Did we get so many listeners that it overloaded the bandwidth?"

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Showbiz Awards

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

Producer, Director and Novelizer.

Lennon and McCartney.

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

"Think of it as buying in – not selling out."

Ernie Studios. Hi, Ernie. What movies are you working on? We have a script about astronauts marooned on a planet filed with talking gorillas who are in hard economic times. I think I'll call it "The Apes of Wrath"! We're casting "Reignman." The central character is a savant monarch. And we're filming a movie about a suburban town populated by women with strange, long hair ... It's called "The Stepford Weaves."

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"After the show, I'll be autographing any computer or phone screens where my albums are streamed."

'Big audio gear is coming back!'

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

'Okay, folks, that's a wrap!'

Cut!

Working in the Hazard Zone!

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

"Same story every morning - 'Can you come and fix our windmill?'..."

"I'm sorry, we're looking for the voice of a spunky animated turnip and your reading is more fruit than vegetable if you understand what I mean."

'Good news. We're not Daft Punk.'

"It's basically the 'Tragedy of King Lear' but with animated penguins."

Canadian film production

Brad Pitt

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

'This is the last time we hire former Cirque du Soleil members as stompers.'

Why you've never heard of Ricky Rat.

New music conference

Buster Keaton