Audience Captor T-Shirts

And with that, the simple malaise that had been bubbling up for months officially became a general malaise.

Taking a peek at the audience

'Look behind you. . . Just kidding.'

'Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking...'

"I now what you've come to expect from me is physical comedy, but tonight I thought we'd try something a little different."

Business coach hiding in speach desk.

How to engage an audience

Nervous at a party.

Giant screen displays conference delegates and not the speaker.

"I seem to have forgotten what I was saying...please...hold the applause!"

"This poem was written at a time in my life when I wrote a poem."

'The ‘class clown' thing is my fault. I totally misjudged the crowd.'

Little guy using telescope to see past a big guy blocking his view in the crowd,

Armless chainsaw juggler.

"All the world's gotta do is look at me once, and I'll tap dance until I die."

"You missed the garlic. The place went nuts when he added the garlic."

'Wow, excellent turnout.'

'That concludes my prepared remarks. I'll take questions that fit my prepared answers.'

"How's that for your 'corporate response?'"

Manager: 'EXCELLENT promoting Jan! It's another RECORD crowd!'

' Pol Meeting'

"What I'd give for a heckler!"

'Does my bum look big on this'

"Nice ass..."

An audience with an audience!

"Sorry, I'm late. I was at Miss Huerta's house and I couldn't get away!"

'I've never been good at public squeaking!'

Trash Test Dummy

'No offence, but I need to capture a wider audience.'