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First Shot Discus Thrower

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

Pete Sampras

Bobby's pitching coach told him to put some stank on the ball.

'Why couldn't you throw like that in the game?'

'Best save I've ever seen.'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'He's gonna dunk on me. I just know it.'

Cat and mouse.

Ok, ok, maybe you guys are right - maybe I do have a concussion.

Pole Vault Rules

The best goalie in the world!

"Fancy dyeing your hair white so everyone could see it was you who played a shocker!"

'We've conducted a chemical analysis of the beef in hot dogs, and we've determined, Mr Ruth, you are guilty of steroid enhancement.'

'He's a bit confused after that last round.'

'When you said, Dream Team, I thought you meant the Swiss Bikini Team.'

Rest in Peace Instant Replay

Rugby - Interesting line-out tactics.

Football Violence

'...And Timmy, as usual, will guard goal.'

'That was a peach of a right hander the referee gave you!'

"Listen, I've had 25 fights and won all but 24 of them."

I think it's time to retire from boxing. I'm too old for life in the fist lane.

T-Rex Racing: A Short-Lived Sport

Captain Ahab and Moby Dick in Retirement

Pole jumper about to land on a giant whoopi cushion.

Hot dog.

'In this...um...part of the circle...'

"Junior, there's more to life than winning. There's also beating the spread."

"I'm sorry I called you boring."

"Wow! This really is a lofted iron!"

Foam finger gets stuck up a foam nose.

Dominique Valera - The King/Cat

Jack Nicholas - Sun-Visor