Asset Aficionado T-Shirts

'To begin with, yoiu'll need assets.'

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

"What's a debenture?"

A Q&A with President Obama over jobs

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

"And for lot 27 we have another old tennis ball."

"In the event of an actual S.E.C. investigation, legal representation will drop from the ceiling."

"Biff's old money, Angelo is new money and Boris is funny money."

Wall Street Couch

'My husband is very sensitive. He cries when he sees sunsets, old romantic films, and falling values of his 401(k)'

"You're a fine one to talk about my spending!"

Crony Capitalism (Always Follow the Money Trail)

Stock market investment advice

Invisible clothes

'For Harland, the only game in town is the bulls versus the bears...'

I love it when you speak Wall Streetese. Say 'to the upside' for me.

'Don't tell me how much you love me. Tell me how my stock is going.'

'Mixed news from the federal reserve...interest rates will drop on savings but will go up on loans.'

TPP - Investor State Dispute Settlement

"The only good news this year, gentlemen, is our massive bonuses."

The burden of carrying the Euro.

'There are only three things that matter in this world, son... bottom line...'

'They say a fool and his money are soon parted. Here's a list of fools. Make it happen.'

'Check with legal and find out -- maybe we're a non-profit.'

'Dad, I know all about the birds and the bees; explain stock-swaps and derivatives.'

'I've never seen a stock crash so hard.'

Economy.

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

'The rich get richer, but what do the poor get?'

"It's not enough being a cat anymore. I want to be a fat cat."

Pulling The Economy Uphill