Aspiring Academic T-Shirts

How was your college tour? Good. Now I need straight A's and 375 extracurriculars to get in. You're exaggerating. Easy for you to say. You've got a 4.0. Yeah, but

"Well, I think it's good that he wants to go to university."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

'Don't bite it.I have to check Daddy next.'

Young Dr. Dolittle.

What else is there to wish for?

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

"With the caveat that the only certainty in this life is uncertainty, I still want to entertain the possibility of being a pundit when I grow up."

"What's your project for the science fair, Arnold?"

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

"Maybe he's so sad that he's leaving us to go to college that he actually looks happy. Please don't ruin it for me with reality."

"The teacher expects too much of me. She wants me to give it the old college try, and I'm only in grade school."

"Remember, education pays, unless you end up an adjunct - like me."

'Stop purring I can't hear your heart beat.'

"Because when you're drafted by the pros, you'll have to be able to sign your contract. That's why you have to attend first grade."

"Gracie, what does a little girl like you wish for? I mean, besides being a doctor, a motivational speaker, a great parent and becoming president?"

'The bad news is you failed all your courses. The good news is you passed the urine test.'

'It's my application to Harvard...'

'Why not take some time off after high school...travel a bit...get a job...make some money...pay your own way through college.'

'I don't make house calls. My mom won't let me leave the yard.'

"Enjoy university darling, and don't come back during the holidays, we're going to air BnB your room."

You got into the college of my choice, and I got into the college of your choice. Now if we could just work something out...

'When you talk about playing, 'at the next level', you mean lawyering, right, not the NBA?'

"The extent of your extracurricular activities in high school, may very well be participation in regular program of oral hygiene using an effective decay preventaative tooth paste, but that won't get you into a good university."

"The counselor wasn't much help about getting into college. All he said was to study hard and get good grades."

Books: Self-Improvement Just keeping up with Joneses.

I got into the college everyone wants to go to! Well played. It's the perfect fit for me! Way to go! Eco-Club. Which one is it? Dunno. Why do you care? So I don't apply there!

Charlie's medical advice always went in one ear and out the other.

'That's all there is in my college fund? That won't even buy the beer!'

'It's great that you want a career in football, Timothy, but don't you think being a striker would be more fun than being a goalpost.'

'My parents couldn't afford to send me to college, so they let me spend a night at a Ramada.'

'I told my teacher that I won't be returning to school. I'm trying out for a pro basketball team, and her services are no longer required.'

'Did you find someone to practice your first aid on, dear?'