Arts And Crafts Detectives Pillows

"Say what you will about Mad Dog Jensen. . . He was the craftiest adversary we ever faced!"

A boy acting suspiciously

'Are you sure this is authentic ancient Indian art?'

Man finishing painting through flap in door.

Jerry's 'culture-vulture' persona was plunged into jeopardy when he mistook a light switch for a modern art installation.

Private Viewing

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

Art Plagiarism

In trays read: Bluff/Blink.

'At a guess I'd say it's one of the lesser Pharoahs.'

'Your father installed a security system.'

'Daddy, why is that man wearing a blank T-shirt?'

"Their entire planet is coated in things called doodads, tchotchkes, trinkets, knick-knacks, bric-a-brac, and clutter."

'What the hell is this the age of?'

'The sun'll be up soon. Can I go downstairs now?'

Paint. I can't decide between Blood of my Enemies and Candy Apple Red.

"You forgot to read the small print Mr Burrows. My charges are ten pounds a letter and you have two hundred and thirty three on this page."

"Hundreds of looted Christmas gifts. . . A missing reindeer. . . does that ring a bell, Mr. Rudolph?"

"It's called The Pastry Shop Mystery. A real Whodoughnut."

'Say what you will about Mad Dog Jensen... He was the craftiest adversary we ever faced!'

"Walking dead letter file."

We discovered the original background during an x-ray. Ice cream.

The Police Artist.

"I've never met one, but I hear offices have fire drills."

William Morris

'Cops and Rubbers.'

'Oooh the Timpsons have got new blinds.' (Blinds read 'Sod off you nosy cow).

'We found these spent cartridges at the scene Chief. Looks like it was Hewlett-Packard.'

Well, maybe you can find a do-it-yourself Youtube video showing a husband taking the clothes to the laundromat.

"Shhh. I think I heard my name."

“The drain was plugged.”

"Looks like something was going on in the Stone Age that they didn't want the Bronze Age to know about."

"Bad news. It's a fake."

"Helene tells me you're into fabrics."

'Antiques are things one generation buys, the next generation gets rid of, and the following generation buys again.'