Artistry Aficionado T-Shirts

'First off, your average Paolozzi has far fewer holes than your Moore.'

"No honestly, your work is good, it's just not instagram good."

You're my Mona Lisa.

Copycats

Madonna of the Pukes.

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

Paul Klee

Cariactures

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

(Camel paintings)

German Expressionist Breakfast

"Mr. Right!"

"An unfortunate museum gift shop." "Banksy activity set." "Jackson Pollock coloring book." "MC Escher building blocks." "Claes Oldenburg miniatures." "Marceau Marceau CDs." "Seurat's connect-the-dots aaAAAAA."

Horti-Culture

Distractions Of The Great

"Lautrec or Gary? Hmmm... We'll take Gary."

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

'It's one of Larry King's earliest shows.'

Baroque Peacock

"And that's General Ambrose T. Spangler. He died in the Great Mustache Fire of 1897."

"The derby is better. That makes you look like Abraham Lincoln."

Spring Training

'Some days I just feel so stuck in a rut that I wish I'd never been invented!'

Painting taking root...

Great works I plan to complete during the lockdown.

"You're my Mona Lisa."

Misunderstood artist

'No, Timmy, we are not supposed to connect them.'

'I can make out the nude, but I don't see the submarine.'

battered artist has painted picture of falling bomb.