Arthurian Scientist Pillows

King Arthur and his Knights of the Periodic Table

Lady of the bath...

"The knights of the round accent table"

Swiss army knife

Knights of the bedside table.

Knights queue up to attempt to pull excalibur with a claw machine.

"This year the endowed chair will go to whomever pulls the sword from the stone."

Knights of the Square Table.

'Exams were harder before the Renaissance.'

'Put the sword back in the stone right now, little girl, and we'll pretend this never happened.'

'Whoever wants my job must lift the sword from the stone.'

'The small sword? That's for internships.'

The Tennis Racket in the Stone

"Whosoever pulleth this sword from this stone, and can eat just two or three of these double-chocolate Amaretto things without finishing the whole box, shall be king born of England!"

Knights of the Round Whatever

Pizza at the Round Table

'The sword in the stone was just a warm-up - now you must remove this remote control ...'

A popular stall at the Giant Sunday Pack Horse Contents Sale in Newark.

"What a midfield wizard!"

"But now it won't stay in mint condition."

"Whoever pulls it out becomes King of Britain, but Phil licked the handle, so..."

Lady of the Remote

Illustration for 'A Legend of Camelot', scene 2.

"Whoa, Galahad-you've got a bad case of knight face."

The Lady of the Lake 2001

"I thought this would be easier than a drawn-out political campaign."

The Lady of the Lake stabs a duck.

Whosoever draweth out the publishing, recording, and distribution contracts from the stone shall forever be acknowledged as the Duke of Earl, and nothing can stop him.

'That's no lady - she hasn't even shaved her armpits.'

'Forget about the Holy Grail for now - I want you to look for weapons of mass destruction.'