Arthurian Buff Pillows

Camelot Casual Fridays

"The knights of the round accent table"

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

Swiss army knife

Knights of the bedside table.

Get on with it!

'Well, somebody on this stupid little planet ordered an extra-large with pepperoni and mushrooms!'

Sadie, I just heard something disturbing, and I think you're the only one who can tell me whether it's true. Youtube is telling me we've lived 300 years of phantom time. Pope Gregory XIII's math was off when he created our calendar, and this is actually the year 1717. What's more, the "Middle Ages" is just a fiction the pope created to explain his rounding error. You were there, Sadie ... Did King Arthur really exist? I'll tell you all about that nice boy, as soon as I demonstrate how we dealt w

If the Brontë sisters wrote science fiction

Knights queue up to attempt to pull excalibur with a claw machine.

"This year the endowed chair will go to whomever pulls the sword from the stone."

Knights of the Square Table.

Verbal Orders

"Whosoever pulleth this sword from this stone, and can eat just two or three of these double-chocolate Amaretto things without finishing the whole box, shall be king born of England!"

Knights of the Round Whatever

'The small sword? That's for internships.'

Charles Dickens

"Thank you earthlings, without your space junk we would be nothing."

Pizza at the Round Table

'Whoever wants my job must lift the sword from the stone.'

Kit makes an appointment

The Tennis Racket in the Stone

'Put the sword back in the stone right now, little girl, and we'll pretend this never happened.'

Planner at work.

'The sword in the stone was just a warm-up - now you must remove this remote control ...'

A popular stall at the Giant Sunday Pack Horse Contents Sale in Newark.

Illustration for 'A Legend of Camelot', scene 2.

"Whoa, Galahad-you've got a bad case of knight face."

"What a midfield wizard!"

"Whoever pulls it out becomes King of Britain, but Phil licked the handle, so..."

Museum of Legend. 6th Century. King Arthur. I wonder which one of King Arthur's knights invented the round table? Sir Cumference.

Remember, what happens in Roswell, stays in Roswell.

"It's true, Caesar. Rome is declining, but I expect it to pick up in the next quarter."

Sir Cowalot.

'Forget about the Holy Grail for now - I want you to look for weapons of mass destruction.'