Art Of Provenance Gifts

Authentic signed Holy Grail

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

"Biff's old money, Angelo is new money and Boris is funny money."

Vincent Van Og.

Congratulations! - You have been nominated for the Turner Prize...

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

Trump attempting to pull down the thinker

'I'm sorry, ladies and gentlemen, but in order for Act 3 to go on we'll need an additional $17,000!'

'This one is from my pre-arts grant period'

"I guess there'll always be a gap between science and technology."

'I still write all my novels longhand.'

'Thrilling news yesterday; my nephew's got the Lascaux Caves commission.'

Cezanne, after he had broken the laws of perspective.

Bearded man with baby sheltered under his beard.

Anyway I thought I'd have a go at this writing lark on the first publisher I showed my scribbles gave me a five book deal.

'...and why does it have to be MY shirt we use as a sail?'

Ancient man

'He got a grant on the condition that he stop painting for a year.'

Visual Effects Cave Man

'Scottish Arts Council? I'm looking for sponsorship to help me sit through a performance of Gotterdammerung.'

"Look, if it's just a matter of collating get one of the clerks to do it."

Lucia is further maddened by the early departure of a subscriber in a sports jacket.

Dip Pen Bouquet

"It's old Mister Banks, the wealthy, establishment art figure!"

Specimen of Mr Punch's Industrial Exhibition of 1850 (to be improved in 1851)

Island with sail.

"Lexington Avenue? It's a couple of blocks that way."

Beauty Contest

Veterans of Cursive Writing

The Genealogist

'Raymond's a frustrated composer.'

New! Stick-on Stigmata

'No,I'm not here to see the doctor,just the magazines.'

Santa's Workshop: Elves' Artisan Co-Op

He's such a perfectionist.