Armchair Fan T-Shirts

'No Ken. Watching football and drinking beer at the same time is NOT multi-tasking!'

'Can you get a move on with my dinner? The football will be on in ten minutes.'

"I can't give you a prescription for milk and cookies."

Hot Pie Therapy

Bird collecting furniture for it's home.

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

'Hold on, Bob. I'm downshifting.'

DIY marriage counseling.

Tuna Salad, Meat Loaf, Cheese Omelet and Bean Soup

"Hi Sean, welcome to my open space. Take a stand and let's talk."

"You've got to learn to love yourself. Start by 'Friending' yourself on Facebook."

"It's beautiful. I'm just not sure it's $800 beautiful."

Viola, cello, 1st violin and 2nd violin vending machine.

'Does the gym have a motorized version of this cycle?'

"Yeah, and the new job lets me work from home."

Relationship Rating: His and Hers

'Slices Mandy! Just slices!'

Eggs portrayed in different art media.

"You dumb clod! Do you realize you're almost two minutes late?"

"Have you tried sitting in a box?"

"Hmmm. Not sure it will go with my wife."

"I'm sorry, sir, but we're not MAGICIANS!"

'We need to try to regress you beyond the last seven seconds...'

'Gurkenman! The fact that you've got a height-adjustable desk does not mean that you've been promoted into a higher position!'

"How do you feel about turning over?"

"With the redundancy and the divorce I'm struggling to remain Mr. Happy."

'The therapy did help your husband find his inner child, unfortunately his inner child is called Dwayne.'

Therapy for the cow dependent

'I have an expense account, but it's a joke.'

"My meeting take away was this chair, what did you get?"

'Dr Freud, this isn't comfortable. Why don't you sit on that chair?' 'That's not a bad idea.'

Woman stuck doing situps has spider web being built under arm

'I keep having these flashbacks.'

Darlene? Rudy? I heard you might be hanging out here. I thought I'd come by just to say hello and see how you're doing. That's nice. Coffee King. I love you. Hence Coffee King. House of Java.