Architecture Critic Pillows

"Welcome to homogenizedville!"

National Repository Of Lessons To Be Learned

'Eww, when did this building get that hideous gargoyle?'

"And of course you're built on a flood plain."

"This 'ranch style' bungalow you're trying to flog us looks like it was built by cowboys!"

You're my Mona Lisa.

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

"You've got a long, long road ahead of you, young man."

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

"Of all the buildings I've designed, it's probably the most handsome."

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

Use your imagination.

"Well....I could've done this!"

'It's a Joan Biro.'

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

"Personally, I'm a doer."

"I may not know much about art, but I do know what's suitable for framing."

'Projectile painting.'

The Kitchen area of a Whitechapel Boarding House

Mr. Empirical With "Antarctica""Small is hostile. Rage contributes to shift away from literality. I'm off to True Value Hardware for some more self-reference tools."

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

Cat statues on entrance gate

Schools of Art - A Rough Guide.

Leaning Wine Bottle of Pisa

'Wow...Your work is amazing!'

The Hall Of Mirrors Jeretski Palace, Plovdo

A corner market is taken over by suburban sprawl.

Couple Sitting in Front of A Sunset.

'I don't care what the blueprints say, I'm certain HE strongly suggested a roof.'

'I can make out the nude, but I don't see the submarine.'

There is nothing more satisfying that peeling the film off a brand new building.