Archaeological Discoveries Gifts

"Sadie, I just heard they discovered lots of ancient cities buried hundreds of years ago in the jungles of Cambodia. They've each got weird geometric patterns outlining what may have been gardens. But no one really knows what they were used for. I guess what I'm asking you is... what were they used for? Y'know, since you were there to see them in their prime. They were used for ritual sacrifices of dullards. For educational purposes, I shall now perform one."

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

'What would your mum say if she saw you drawing all over the wall like that?'

"What's a patent?"

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

'I pledge allegiance to the atom, and to the periodic table on which it stands, many particles indivisible, with orbitals and electrons for all.'

"The Ice Age must've caught him by surprise..."

The first car accident.

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

"Something very big buried a lot of bones here."

"Hmm...well...It'll look better when it's finished...!"

"Congratulations, Amruk. You prove they do exist."

Intelligent people laugh too!

Stoneage puncture repair kit...

"I don’t know what your invention’s called, but it’s really irritating."

Interdisciplinary studies.

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

Anthropologists discover the earliest known depiction of Jazz Hands.

"I've come across a rather disturbing find, Carstairs!"

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

'It's one of Larry King's earliest shows.'

"You have to believe what you're doing will lead to something valuable, even though it probably won't."

Physician tending a mummy.

'A wheel? No wonder I broke a tooth. I thought it was a donut.'

Sphinx cat and mummy mouse

'They look more up to date than the ones in your tool-box.'

"We're having one heck of a time building that trapezoidal thing of yours..."

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

Sundial Time

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

"What does it mean? Heck, I don't know! It's mystifying!"

The First Fire Stick

'The wheel was easy, the owner's manual is hard!'