Arachnophobia Humorist Gifts

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

"Well, you said you wanted something to remove spiders from the bath!"

'Bernice . . . could you come in here please? Bring a can of hairspray and a cigarette lighter!'

Little Miss Muffet's Graduation.

'What's our stockbroker doing in the shower? Quick! Run and get me a rolled up copy of the Wall Street Journal!'

"I won't bring any more friends home unless you let me play with them first!"

"I wish I had known you have arachnophobia before I paid."

'Don't hurt it.'

'He won't go back into his house until I check to make sure the spider is gone.'

Horror

'That's right! No huffing a puffing for 30 minutes on a treadmill. We've developed a new stress test that is faster and more accurate.'

'Honey, that spider's in the bath again!'

"I see spiders on Mars! Do you know what that means? "we need to send an exterminator?"

I don't know why you don't just cancel your subscription to the Rock-of-the-Month club.

So how long have you had this fear of spiders ?

Spider Horror Movies

'You've been drinking again.'

Lady reads book about beating phobias.

'I hate you, Al.'

"You know humans eat eight of us in their sleep every year."

Arachnophobia training.

After being frightened away too many times, Miss Muffett decided to rif herself of the spider.

Judge about to hit spider with mallet.

"AA-ARGH!"

'Now, Mrs. Jenkins, I'm going to try a slightly different approach to deal with your fear of spiders!'

'On the other hand it does have a certain charm'

Shipwreaked man rejecting desert island because of a spider

Plumbers afraid of Spiders

'And this is the lesser-known: 'It made me scream''.

"You didn't believe her when she said there was a giant spider in the bathtub, did you?"

"Okay, Mr. Nerdmyer, I'm just going to give you a little stress test!"

'I'd like to find romance online, but I'm, ya know...afraid of the web.'

Ever since he was a little magazine, he had been deathly afraid of spiders, and he didn't like where this was going,

"I hate bugs...especially if they are in the software of this robot-spider."

'You should have been there. All I did was sit down beside her.'