App Critic T-Shirts

"Then your app is wrong. It's definitely snowing."

The top four worst-selling apps.

"Check it out! This app tells me how much money I have in my bank account!"

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

Valuable business advice from some famous disruptive technologies.

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

'Assuming their porridge was poured at the same time, how could it then be too hot, too cold and just right?'

"You know, there are other emojis."

'Oh, and this ringtone is an app that alerts me when a fly ball is headed my way.'

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

Statue of Liberty with satellite dish and laptop spying on the World.

'Tech stocks dropped on the finding that technology isn't neccessarily the best solution to everything.'

"Isn't there an app for this?"

'The secret to great wealth and spiritual contentment? Ok, hold on...I think I've got an app for that..'

"You'll do everything...accounting, marketing, manufacturing...with no pay or benefits...and three years from now we'll trade you in for a newer, sexier model."

Twitter censorship

"I wrote this one after my third startup failed. It’s called ‘I Got Yer App Right Here.’"

"AI chat bot"

'My new cellphone has a 'self-help' program...'

All the apps hidden within a phone

"There's an app that helped me finish grades 3 through 7. If you need me, I'll be in my room playing video games for the next few years."

"And next up, Fairy Tales: FolkLORE or FolkLIES!"

'Play post office? -- I don't like violent games.'

'Normally, this project would require weeks of research and verification...but luckily there's an app for it.'

God's Phone

'We don't have a cure for your ailment but there is an appropriate app available.'

"Now that we have these Earthlings in our power, we can take over this planet!"

Modern Day Kids Playing 'Telephone'

Modern Life Blues

"Your driver will arrive in 4...9...17 minutes after three accidental loops around the airport."

"I don't know where to begin, each dish has its own app."

Social media and censorship...

'Maximising shareholder value doesn't count.'

'This app is linked to my financial advisor and provides stimulated hand-holding when the market is down.'