Apostrophe Advocator Gifts

Punctuation being forgotten - say linguist's.

Trial by Media

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

Punctuation Police

Thank you, Essential Workers

Detention Center

"What do you mean?! That apology is the best piece of fiction I've ever written!"

"I can hear Brooklyn becoming played out."

The problem is, too many people aren't the least bit particular about their arrows.

"They're class action figures."

Human Rights for All

"Grammar-police, sir, we have some questions about your online posts and the inappropriate use of apostrophes."

The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

Tomato's, Cucumber's, Apostrophe's.

"'Disability benefits' they said... Not while there are perfectly good jobs as traffic cones to be had!"

"He sounds authentic. That gets my vote."

The scales between gluttony and hunger

"I'd like to report a case of historical sexual abuse in the sixties. I'd like to - but I can't!"

"Sorry, pal. I just need to make sure she likes me for me."

Good News

'I appeared to start selling more when I stopped appearing to sell.'

"I thought I'd try a Marie Antoinette for a change."

Atheist Convention: 'I don't believe it!'

"Hmm interesting Hallmark..."

Complaining about poor grammar

Violence against children.

'Please Miss, why does 'Earl's Court' have an apostrophe but 'barons Court' doesn't?'

"Boss, I'm more than just a cashier and mopper-upper guy."

"Called to the piano bar again, you naughty boy?"

'I'm not kidding....my client is really insane!'

"Mr. Bermudez, as candidate for mayor, I need your vote. I think we can agree that the most urgent issues are education, employment and political access!"

Bureau of Disappearing Civil Liberties

Labour Protests