Apartment Antics Enthusiast Pillows

"Ah-hah! Gloria Hendershuster, I always suspected it was you stealing laundry!"

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

Fish-tank Skyscraper.

"I thought we'd eat out on the patio for a change."

The day Bob finally understood radiation of species.

Upper West Side Story

"What's all this?"

Complaints at the Beehive Condo

For the musician strapped for space...the Murphy piano.

'Honey, I'm home.'

Natural Phenomena of 15-E

"It just seems to me, Howard, that you're missing the whole point of having a terrace in the city."

Yeah? Delivery! Come on up!

"My kitchen is very small. Do you have any with doors that swing in?"

"That's the window, dear. The bookcase is over to your right."

Estate Agent - 'They're all mine.'

"If a sixth borough opens up, I'll let you know."

'It was your typical student flat: dirty dishes, broken furniture, grubby carpet and cracks in the walls'

'You can come back in, King Kong. The superintendent got the door open.'

"Are you walking the dog? We live on the third floor!"

Bob hated using the elevator as much as it hated being used.

'Couldn't you people have a dog or a cat for a pet?'

Fun with candy.

"I still can't believe you're leaving a two bedroom for a studio."

"When I asked you of you were ready for this promotion, you flailed uncontrollably. Was that a lie?"

"I think investors have been a bit concerned about these tiny 'microflats' we're converting."

"One BHK, two baths, and sixty three plug points."

"Don't get the wrong idea, but I think I should tell you that all my furnishings are from Ikea."

"Would you like me to show you around my apartment and tell you how much I paid for everything?"

'Keep that dividing down!'

'Well, you do wonder don't you?'

Retired From Home

"It's Jason from next door. DO we want to buy a transcript of last night's argument?"

"So what if it's small," the realtor says, "it's not like you'll be stuck in there."