Antivirus Advocate Pillows

"Mom, can we get a pet so I can use its name in answering a password security question?"

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

The Anti-Agent

"Too crowded. Let's go."

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

"He's taught himself work-life balance."

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

The Circular Logic of Fascism

"Uh-oh...it's starting to delegate work to me."

"They didn't want to be identified in my photo, so I blurred their butts."

"So, what does everyone think of XX81's suggestion for increased funding into AI research?"

"I just found a unicorn! Apparently, they just want to be left alone."

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

"Before I do this, I would ask everyone to please delete the footage in the event of this not going as planned."

"I fear one day our jobs will be taken over by technology."

"My mom programmed my toothbrush to follow me until I use it. It's cruel but effective."

Statue of Liberty with satellite dish and laptop spying on the World.

"We-your agents, successors, licensees, and assigns--would like to share a few thoughts with you."

"You work well without supervision? Fat chance of that happening in here!"

"I was going to have my people call his people, but I’m pretty sure his people have Caller I.D."

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

"You'll do everything...accounting, marketing, manufacturing...with no pay or benefits...and three years from now we'll trade you in for a newer, sexier model."

AI Safety Officer

"Don't deny it. You only wanted me for my metadata."

'To hear our privacy policy, please tell us you credit card and social security numbers...'

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

"Your job is to build an app that replaces you."

"Yes, I'm alone."

"I've added an additional response to the doc's health questionnaire. It's called 'Mind Your Own Business.'"

Police Statetion

'Boy, being an endangered species is quite hard: I get weighed, tagged, filmed, recorded and studied by scientists: I have no privacy...'

Employee of the Month

The Best Defense

CCTV in church.

Privacy