Anti-celebrity Crusader Gifts

'I'm looking for something not written by a celebrity.'

Funny, this is the same pill the head of the price-gouging drug company needs to take so he can sleep at night, too. Pharmac …

'Now that you've all had a chance to try the shampoo we would like you to fill in this questionnaire.'

"Don't worry, boss, he ain't gonna be takin' his shoes off on an airplane no more."

Rupert Murdoch in the mud.

'It says...desperately seeking someone to explain the difference between Obamacare and the Affordable Health Care Act...'

That night, Andy attempted to start a Twitter revolution.

Trump supporters raise the Nazi flag after Charlottesville.

Bees full of righteous indignation swarm the honey company's executive suite.

"To be honest we can't afford to be honest."

'This is outrageous! I could go to prison for sending miners into an unsafe mine!'

Capitalism

"What??? For that money I used to get at least a judge, a congressman, and a city councilman!!"

Gun control

'I know right from wrong and that's been holding me back.'

"Jeff's trying to get his Facebook friends back down to zero."

'I'd like to outlaw street mimes, too, but they have the right to remain silent.'

Fired Editorial Cartoonists

"BACK FIEND! Take your damned bill and go back from whence you came!"

Colin was determined not to go thirsty on the fun run,,,

'I said what I thought, then I apologized when I started losing advertisers. What does that make me?'

Internet Uprising

"Some of your viewers thought your recent 'You'll be sweating like a w***e in church' forecast was a tad offensive."

Keep Every Buck

"We don't like the way you refer to them as 'hymns'."

"Every time I get out of my political silo and try to converse respectfully with someone who has differing views, I get whacked so hard I can't see straight!"

"Just throw the stick...there is no remote control."

'I always wanted a career in social work...to make a difference, to help people!'

"Are you comfortable with your executive salary?"

'It's 'Wolverines Without Borders'. . . They want you to perform classic Fusco material in development countries where people don't have access to the comics.'

Women's Vote and the GOP.

Ingrates

Inappropriate behavior

"The great thing about my charity is that all donations go directly to the needy."

Soccer Moms Against Corruption