Annual Gatherings Gifts

'Oh God!!...the members of the church choir have their annual dinner!'

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

'Well the good news is that we've landed some huge contracts in China!'

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

The devil you know and his plus one

Illustration from an Unpublished Novel

The prying mantis,

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

A man looks up at the earth

Paul goes home for the holidays

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

"You two seem oddly suited."

'Sure, I'm a working mother - is there any other kind?'

'The Ambassador will not be pleased, Madame.'

"I was a lot happier with the elephant in the room."

'Ms. Snack, prepare the conference room for an executive sting.'

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

"Phil's an expert networker. One drink and he's on schmooze-control."

A Day in the Country.

'All right, I wanna know which one of you really like me and which ones are just networking...'

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

'When you said I would go places with the firm , sir, I was rather hoping for more than the annual outings...'

"You're doing fine - don't watch your feet."

Midwest Winter Items.

'I don't think we're devoted to the Lord. I think we're devoted to dessert.'

Playing cards.

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

Anton's Bar and Grill

'I'm calling this a plate and I already have service for six. Six more and I can invent the dinner party.'

Unintelligible speaker at Subway Announcers Dinner.

Shall I be mother?