Anniversary Celebrator T-Shirts

"It's our anniversary, bring us your best bottle of beer."

"Over the long haul, it's been a long haul."

Ask Sadie. Sadie, my wife deserves so much more than I can give her. What can I buy her for our upcoming 36th wedding anniversary? - Wayne. *Actual reader letter. The 36th wedding anniversary? Isn't that wood paneling? What? First is paper, second is cotton, third is leather, and so forth. But wood paneling? Stucco? She has no clue. But she intuits these are the remodeling years.

"Do we have any for 25 years? That's a good one, sir! I can't wait to tell that to the rest of the staff!!"

A slap-up meal.

"And they said it would never last."

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

Shepherd and eurydice

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

Tartine

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

Playing Fetch.

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

Killer Executive Suits.

You're my Mona Lisa.

"This place has the best happy hour."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

Demure lady with gloves

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

Sloaney Pony.

"Where else in the world would you get such wonderful sunsets?"

In his younger days Spock was quite the comedian.

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

LAY ZEE FUK

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.