Animal Parent Pillows

"Yes, when I was young, I was a golden retriever: I'm more like a silver retriever now..."

'Son, I think you're old enough now to know about the birds and the fleas.'

"Beats me. They put up the sign and went to their panic room."

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

"Being raised in the city, Fred didn’t quite grasp the true purpose of a game camera."

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

Playing Fetch.

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

"Just be yourself."

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

Polly txt speak

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

"I can't believe how great my life is now: We used to live in an apartment, but now, I have my own garden..."

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'What would your mum say if she saw you drawing all over the wall like that?'

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

In his younger days Spock was quite the comedian.

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."