Animal Language Pillows

"And here is the very stone that finally enabled us to figure out what all those dogs and cats were saying."

"It get it – you're hungry."

"Barking sometimes helps me relax. But then it drives the neighbors crazy."

"They didn't want to be identified in my photo, so I blurred their butts."

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

"The answer to bone loss is to bury them deeper.'

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

"I'm all for pushing them out of the nest, but maybe next time we could wait till they hatch."

"Just a brief moment, Linda, to thank you for my delicious meals. And if you need me by your side... just whistle." "What fresh hell is this?"

"Bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: fwd: bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: fwd: fwd: bark bark bark bark"

"I have no thumbs."

'You'll get five paid sick days, plus an additional two when you're shedding your skin.'

"You understand that they call you 'good boy' because they can't remember your name, right? They never forget my name, they care about me..."

"You don't whisper anymore."

"Look, he just wants to apologize for scaring the daylights out of you yesterday. ... Mr. Squirrel? ..."

'Polly wants a cracker! Fetch!'

'Iguana know what time it is.'

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

"I think it loves us."

"Just what emotion is your emotional support dog supporting?"

"Yes, that's the tree with all the squirrels from yesterday. And no, I don't know where they are today."

"Hold that thought, my love. I'm listening – I just need to pee on those daylilies."

"Oh, she talk a lot...but only about her children."

ONE HORSE TOWN

"Are you happy with your current ball?"

"At least you don’t need a wetsuit."

"Obviously, I can't fly like you, but if you teach me, I can probably sing like you..."

'I'm having a bad whisker day.'

Dogs Must Be On A Leash.

The bluebird of passive-aggressiveness

'Quotes, woof, woof, woof, woof, closed quotes.'

"The etchings are in the library."