Animal Comedy Connoisseur Prints

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

New and improved! BunkerBuster! Get out of the sand trap every single time - or your money back!!

Faster, Georges, faster!

"And, when the DNA test results arrived, the woman realized her so-called 'little terrier mix' had been part German shepherd all along."

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

The Rooster Comedian.

'He likes to power nap.'

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Night of the Latkes

Farm Humor.

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

The Trojan Beagle.

Happy Hour

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

Emergency Phone.

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

Bangers and Mash

'Which wine list would you like, Sir - Classics or Plonk?'

The Snarky District

"You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the heck else are you talking... you talking to me?"

10 Good Things about a Minnesota Winter.

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.

'Satchel, I have just had a revelation.'

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'