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'Well, Mr. Swine, it looks like you pulled a hamstring.'

'Stop cracking and hulling his seeds. He's accustomed to working for his food.'

The Canine's version of cans tied to the back of a wedding car driving off with Cats attached

'What's founder?'

Canine Comedians

'Yessir, I just finished my first spay...but how did you know?'

"Must we discuss your worming right before dinner?"

"Has he had all his shots"

'You broke your wishbone. I'd suggest making a wish.'

"I think we feed to many vitamins to Tweety"

"You've had dogs, cats, birds and even a pony. . . how come your only pets that survive are fish, Arielle?"

"...and the cast should come off in four to six weeks."

Cats 'Playing' Cards

'Under the circumstances, I feel that it would be best if you had another doctor!'

'But on the plus side, I'm picking up HBO.'

The Assistant

'Now you do know she needs a bath every week and an oil change every 3000 miles?'

Strictly Ornamental.

'Here! I saved his anal sacs for you.'

"When will he be able to sit up and beg?"

"All you have to do is get three of your friends, to get three of their friends and so on. You'll be rich."

"It was worth it to get rid of the fleas!"

Animal Hospital

'You think you need WHAT glands expressed?'

'It will cost $1000 to spay your dog, Ma'am, but call me again tomorrow at my office....

A cat is a dog in drag...'Bad dog!'

A dog locks a man out and sleeps in his bed.

'Scalpel, dammit! Scalpel!'

'What are we going to do about these grooming parlors...'

Welcome to the Society of Veterinarians Who Have Spayed Tomcats!'

'You srow ze glove in my face?...'

Marvo and his fleas at the vets, Vet with gun "I'm sorry but he's broken a leg".

'Louder, Doctor! I can't make out what you're saying.'

'Every time we go out for a steak dinner, Sander thinks he recongnizes...

All Employees Must Wash Paws After Using Litter Box.