Animal Breeder Pillows

"No, there's nothing wrong with her. Daisy here has been bred only to produce skimmed milk."

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

"Congratulations. It's a litter."

"Why don't they come up with a breed that'll live longer?"

"I swear, he's my half brother: he's a mule you see..."

'Now, to get her pregnant, we'll have to use some hormone therapy.'

'Come on, you can tell me: I've had so many pregnancies, I'm an expert at weird cravings...'

'What sort of mix is she?'

'He faked an orgasm.'

Snake Breeding Program...KNOCK BEFORE ENTERING! Welcome all ye who slither here

'He's an octopussy. They're specially bred to catch over 100 mice an hour.'

'I am fed up all I get is rabbit, rabbit, rabbit!'

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

"Wow. . . what's that?!"

"Cross-breeding oops #1." "The Cougadooodle"

'He's a superior breed - He always drinks thru' a straw!'

'What has twelve legs and barks?'

Collies Without Borders

'Another blond hair! You've been making a lot of night calls lately...'

Kultural K9's.

'Well, they're just great for running down gazelles and jackals!'

'Do you have anything a little longer in the leg ?'

"You are going to have lots of puppies."

Fred and Nancy believed that their mutual love of a good sale would be enough to overcome 'the species issue'... but they were wrong.

Puppies

'Boy, am I going to be pleased when the pregnancy is over...'

'Sorry Ben, I never noticed the baby-sitting clause in the stud contract.'

Man lets his pigeons out to be fed in the park.

The worm that churned!

"His father came from a family of climbers."

"I'm sixty three in human years and the mother of octuplets. Again."

'It's a bloody-cross-breed.'

Good, but not Great Danes.

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

'I understand you don't have a resume but you do have your pedigree papers?'