Angelic Optimist Pillows

"I was hoping that heaven might be, you know, more transcendent."

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

"I figure if I was still employed, I wouldn’t get to spend all this time with you!"

"Fred's calculating what future natural catastrophes he can ignore based on his probably life span."

'You just don't know when to give up, do you?'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

"Well, look at the bright side, Timmy — you're 100 percent wrong."

"Alright! Whoa! Yes! More boiled food!"

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

"Surgery up here is free!"

"I feel like that I've been given a unique oppurtunity to speak out on issues."

"Will you listen to the same three anecdotes until one of you dies?"

"I thought there would be bacon here."

Economic Outlook Conference - 'Remember the seating is optimist, pessimist, optimist,...'

"You're new here ... it's customary on dismal Monday mornings to be miserable."

Six Thinking Hats

"Who's a good boy? You're a good boy."

"What's this for poorer stuff?"

'I tried being pessimistic. I was terrible at it.'

"The good news is...you've one less window to wash."

'The only part of my body that defies gravity is my age.'

"The pizza came late and it was cold!"

'When my business turned into a lemon, I made lemonade....but that also failed when nobody liked its taste'

The Death of the Blues

I have to get the Positive Thinker...

'Stocks plummeted on news of your demise.'

"Well, there's nowhere to go but up."

Infinity Tavern

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

"You might ask, 'Can two people who love each other find happiness in an era of skyrocketing deficits?' I think they can."

Why Do Old Hippies Smile?

"I think I can". (train)

'I've moved from being cautiously optimistic to being optimistically cautious.'

Is your glass half full or half empty? Who cares, fill her up!