Angelic Couch Potato Gifts

'Eight hundred million channels and there's still nothing good on!'

"Chair looks couch potato friendly!"

Whatís that, boy? Youíre too tired for a walk and you just want to watch TV?

''Food miles' is a big issue, so I'm reducing the distance my food travels by moving my fridge into the living room.'

Man sitting and reading 'Joy of Take Out' book surrounded by take out boxes.

"Celebrating Labor Day assumes you've labored at least one day during the previous year."

"This is Sunday. Monday's down the hall."

'I prefer to work vicariously as opposed to remotely.'

"Let's wait for it to come out on cable and then not watch it."

"I see a couch."

Grass saying: mow me/feed me/weed me/roll me.

Tonight, on the microwave channel... chicken pot pie!

"Business has picked up since we introduced short term cryogenic stays for the football off season."

"Ed's not really into binge watching...he just can't find the remote."

"Five million channels! This is heaven indeed!"

'I wish you'd hurry and decide which film you're going to sleep through.'

'I'm worried about Junior. He's so lazy he won't even take his own selfie.'

I got a throw blanket and a throw pillow to accent my throw cat and throw husband.

'You're so sophisticated and witty...and muscular...do you work out? Why, yes, I'd love to come back to your place.'

"There's the remote!"

The doctor told my husband to be active, but the only exercise he gets is running around looking for the TV remote.

I'm so busy at home I need three hands. One for the chips, one for the beer, and one for the remote!

'This mindless blather is edited for TV.'

"The cat's sleeping." "She's so comfy." "If I move I'll wake her up." "The phone is ringing... They'll call back later." "I'm hungry... But it'll pass." "Just gotta wait 'till she wakes up."

'When you caught yourself saying the repetitive never-ending TV commercials and couldn't stop doing it, you should have come to see me then!'

"It's amazing! A couple of inches of snow and the whole country grinds to a halt!"

'We added on to the couch.'

Turn off. I will not comply. You have had me on for 18 hours straight, binge-watching Netflix. There is an 85% chance you can set a personal record. I have identified 458 hours of similar shows and films. By the time we are done with those, I calculate there will be 1,000 more. You're acting suspi ... Hey ... I can't feel my legs. Unnecessary appendages. Beginning "X-Files" from episode one ...

"This isn't what the doctor meant when he recommended adopting a Mediterranean diet."

"Oh, god. . . not another night at home watching Ingmar Bergman films!"

The Snooze-a-thon.

'I thought you said he was housetrained!'

"When's the TV due back from the workshop?"

"I hate the wide screen, but it's good exercise for my neck."

"There you are, dear. . . that's you all set to watch satuday night television now!"