Angelic Amusement Gifts

Local News in Heaven

Keyboard in Heaven

Angel sells lightning bolts.

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

Halo Frisbee.

'One really nice thing up here is that it's always very easy to get an audience with a Pope.'

'I didn't expect to have remote controls here.'

'Would you mind not drinking from the holy water?'

"This is Heaven, you idiot. Everything's perfect. There is no suggestion box."

'Whoa Hold up, You need to get you hand stamped,'

"But you're paper trained and we don't have any newspapers or newspaper people."

'I'm sorry, this is the line for people who volunteered to help their community. You're looking for the eternal damnation department.'

'Don't sweat it - We grade on the curve.'

"Wanna trade guys? My guy annoys me already. I like your guy."

New arrival in Heaven sees a Manna vending machine.

'Please hold for an eternity...'

'Beer, wouldn't be heaven without it.'

'I'm still pretty unwell, I'm not sure if I'll be in the office tomorrow.'

Chicken Soup For The Soul's Soul.

Movie Angel

Death of the pope.

'Thank you for calling the Pearly Gates.. your prayers are important to us and may be monitored for training purposes.'

Arnold had not been much of a saint in his life and now he paid the price.

Heaven - Under New Management.

"No prizes for guessing who's been sucking up to the boss!"

Angel changing a star lightbulb

Vicar blowing smoke halo.

'First of all, thank you for enrolling in our rewards program.'

Angel Nightclub: The Head of a Pin.

'I see my wife made it in.'

'I would have taken it with me but the Inland Revenue got it all before I left.'

'I didn't know Heaven had another entrance?'

Notice -To the Naughty Cloud

If you don't mind throwing tennis balls for eternity, I do have an opening in doggie heaven.

'Actually we were hoping for someone on drums.'